I don’t get it.  Ok, I get it a little. When you get older, your reflexes get slower, you’re more cautious, 55 mph feels like 100, you’re wary of the young whippersnappers out on the road that drive like maniacs so you turn on the extra slow driving.

Unless you’re my grandmother with her lead foot. “I’m 85, I don’t have to drive slow, my hair needs done NOW!”

So I’m behind someone driving 35 mph in a 45 mph lane.  We have driven by the speed limit sign enough times now that anyone with, well, EYES, knows the speed limit.  I’m less than half my grandma’s age and I have no desire to take my time. It’s my constitutional right to go the speed limit. (Look it up, it’s in there somewhere, I’m sure of it.)  So I might have a bit of road rage for those that do not allow me my freedoms that this grand country has allowed me, dammit.

So I finally pass, most likely unsafely, but ONLY if my kids aren’t with me…most of the time. And sure enough, it’s an old man wearing a hat. OR some dumbass on a cell phone, but that’s a whole other issue.

So, my question is, is it the hat?  It’s rarely ever a ball cap. It’s usually a fedora of some kind. Nothing you usually see on anyone under 105 years old. Ok, that might be an exaggeration, I’m prone to those.  No one under 55 usually wears them.  Do they have some sort of speed limit sign blinders in them?  I have never, in my entire life of driving been behind an old man wearing a hat and not wanted to scream, tailgate, clutch my heart and scream “MY PILLS”, or just turn into a foul-mouthed creature…

Why?  For giggles once, I put a hat on to drive, and nothing happened. Well, nothing except my hair looked like ass when I took it off, but I still drove the speed limit.